Relationship problems... ANYTHING GOES!

**salad** · 05-13-2009 03:05 PM

my poor wife... shes married to a fckin psycho

**moozooman** · 05-13-2009 03:34 PM

I got a phone call from a gorgeous ex-girlfriend the other day. We lost track of time, chatting about the wild, romantic nights we used to enjoy together. I couldn't believe it when she asked if I'd be interested in meeting up and rekindling a little of that "magic." "Wow!" I said. "I don't know if I could keep pace with you now. I'm a bit older and a bit balder than when you last saw me." She just giggled and said she was sure I'd "rise" to the challenge. "Yeah." I said. "Just so long as you don't mind a man with a waistline that's a few inches wider these days!" She laughed and told me to stop being so silly. She teased me saying that tubby bald men were cute, and she was sure I would still be a great lover. Anyway, she giggled, "I've put on a few pounds myself!" So I told her to fck off.

**pepperdro** · 05-13-2009 04:02 PM

Originally Posted by moozooman

I got a phone call from a gorgeous ex-girlfriend the other day. We lost track of time, chatting about the wild, romantic nights we used to enjoy together. I couldn't believe it when she asked if I'd be interested in meeting up and rekindling a little of that "magic." "Wow!" I said. "I don't know if I could keep pace with you now. I'm a bit older and a bit balder than when you last saw me." She just giggled and said she was sure I'd "rise" to the challenge. "Yeah." I said. "Just so long as you don't mind a man with a waistline that's a few inches wider these days!" She laughed and told me to stop being so silly. She teased me saying that tubby bald men were cute, and she was sure I would still be a great lover. Anyway, she giggled, "I've put on a few pounds myself!" So I told her to fck off.

...sorry that's all I have for a post so incredible...

**Khonsu** · 05-13-2009 05:28 PM

Originally Posted by moozooman

Anyway, she giggled, "I've put on a few pounds myself!" So I told her to fck off.

LOL 8)

Let me just say I am a walking reason for all the advice so far given in this thread. If you do not break ties with someone or you try and keep it altogether because your not use to anything outside of the relationship you've always known, you'll lose.

What I mean is I've been in a horrible year relationship where through the stress and annoyance of my ex I ended up getting health problems because of it. It got so bad I got to the point where I lost all emotion in everything I was doing with my life and it was only at that point I broke up with her. It's been seven months since then and I've realized from my own mistakes that you cannot take everything seriously. You cannot let yourself get hung up on the only relationship you've ever had, the part time or full time job your currently dealing with, or the school work that is pointless in the first place. Gotta just always remember that there is more out there and if you can work up the -patience- you will find it in no time.

**SUPERBALLER** · 05-13-2009 06:09 PM

My parents just got divorced IT SUCKS

**big_loaf** · 05-13-2009 07:18 PM

Originally Posted by SUPERBALLER

My parents just got divorced IT SUCKS

That's not advice!

Seriously though, that sucks to hear. I'm sure you've heard all the cliche's already, but they're pretty much all true. It's not your fault and you parents still love you. The best course of action is to immerse yourself in another activity (skating?!) to distract you from the situation at home. I wouldn't suggest bottling up all your feelings pertaining to the matter though, as that can manifest itself in nasty ways down the road. Having a friend to talk to about this sort of thing helps a lot, so don't be afraid to reach out!

**Big Dev** · 05-13-2009 09:21 PM

my girlfriend always gets ridiculously pissed at me whenever i smoke weed (once or twice a month MAYBE) and its so unnecessary...

Anybody thats not ignorant can see that weed is nottttt a big deal

don't get me wrong, its cool if you don't want to fck with it, but jesus...

**moozooman** · 05-13-2009 10:33 PM

Originally Posted by pepperdro

...sorry that's all I have for a post so incredible...

**bakersfield90** · 05-14-2009 02:21 PM

Originally Posted by moozooman

I thought I was the only one who goes to the Digg front page!

**pepperdro** · 05-14-2009 03:07 PM

Originally Posted by bakersfield90

I thought I was the only one who goes to the Digg front page!

DAMN! I can't see this on government computers... it blocks webpictures and videos....

**Ado** · 05-14-2009 03:13 PM

No women downhill....

**Crappysurfer** · 05-14-2009 04:57 PM

"we shouldnt talk anymore..."
"why?.. ?"
"because i love you..."

**SUPERBALLER** · 05-14-2009 06:00 PM

Originally Posted by big_loaf

That's not advice!

Seriously though, that sucks to hear. I'm sure you've heard all the cliche's already, but they're pretty much all true. It's not your fault and you parents still love you. The best course of action is to immerse yourself in another activity (skating?!) to distract you from the situation at home. I wouldn't suggest bottling up all your feelings pertaining to the matter though, as that can manifest itself in nasty ways down the road. Having a friend to talk to about this sort of thing helps a lot, so don't be afraid to reach out!

Yea I am sorry I did not know this was a advice thread its all good yea I do skate ALOT

Thanks dude for your support

**BUboarder** · 05-15-2009 01:07 AM

Originally Posted by SUPERBALLER

Yea I am sorry I did not know this was a advice thread its all good yea I do skate ALOT

Thanks dude for your support

no no, he's just playin' hence the laughing face

**big_loaf** · 05-15-2009 04:04 AM

Originally Posted by BUboarder

no no, he's just playin' hence the laughing face

Kidding about my advice comment, yes, but the advice I gave is sincere. I went through the whole divorce thing when I was younger, and it was a messy and shitty situation to be in for sure. I didn't have anyone to talk or vent to back then, so if I can be of any help to anyone now, I will certainly try!

*edit* vvvv

**big_loaf** · 05-15-2009 04:05 AM

*edit* ^^^

Decided to make this a separate post, and it turned out to be mammoth sized

******

My relationship problem is minor, yet major at the same time; Boredom.

Three and some odd years in, and we both get along just fine. We never fight (minor disagreements a couple times a year), the sexy time is good (though more infrequent than I'd like), and we still share some of the same opinions & interests. But therein lies the problem...everything is just "fine". The "spark" has faded a couple times during the course of our relationship, but we were usually able to rekindle it with a bit of effort. The issue now is that the spark is gone, and (for me at least) I doubt that it can be brought back this time.
We started seeing each other when I was 19, and her at 17. Almost four full years at this stage of development as an adult is one hell of a long time, and I know for a fact that we have drifted and grown in different directions. This situation has only been compounded by my (comparably) vast wealth of life experience both before we met, and since. It is becoming more and more apparent each day that we are no longer the same people we were when we began this journey almost four years ago. In the past, I have tried to take our relationship to the next level by suggesting we move in together, but I know now that the chances of that happening any time in the next five to ten years are slim to none. As a result, I don't see the relationship progressing anywhere beyond where we are currently at. While I am dead against marriage and all that garbage, I would still like to see some further development beyond "let's hang out at your place; my parents are home". It all just feels a little too juvenile for me, akin to a "highschool" relationship, and I want something more.

My main concern at this point is her well being, as I know she will be devastated if/when I break the news to her. She is a great person and a kind soul, and the last thing I want to do is hurt her after being the closest of friends (and lovers) for this length of time. On the other hand, I know I'm not doing anyone any favours by hanging on to a relationship that is no longer mutually rewarding. A distant second concern following her well being, is my own. I never had what I would call a "stable relationship" before her, and I am straight up afraid of what might happen if I leave her and venture out into the great unknown. I have had to listen to far too many of my friends complain about bitchy, controlling, abusive, and just plain psycho women they have met in their time served in the dating world...and I am in no way excited at the prospect of going through this (again) any time soon.

I have spent more time pondering my situation that I would care to divulge, and the way I see it, is that it boils down to one of two solutions. Either I pull the trigger and take the plunge back into the singles pool, unsure of the outcome...or I make yet another attempt to salvage a relationship that I'm not sure I want to salvage, and possibly prolong the inevitable and deteriorate what's left of our friendship. Neither of the two scenarios are easy ones, and I wish I didn't have to pick one.
What I want to get out of this situation is the both of us feeling happy and healthy, while still remaining the close friends that we are...however difficult that may be.

To the few that know me personally, I ask that you please keep this under your hats...though I know most of you pricks never venture into Anything Goes

Though this was mostly just to vent (and how!), feel free to offer up any advice if I haven't put you to sleep yet! Though as you may have noticed, I've pretty much got things figured out...it's just a matter of where and when

**Archy** · 05-15-2009 04:49 AM

You don't want to live with a splinter in your mind.

**jmasta** · 05-15-2009 04:54 AM

big_loaf:

break up with her..... so you can have that crazy make-up sex!

and bam! there's your spark

**jmasta** · 05-15-2009 04:57 AM

Originally Posted by Archy

"You take the NyQuil, the story ends, you wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe. You take the DayQuil, you stay in Wonderland, and I show you how deep the rabbit hole goes."

**Khonsu** · 05-15-2009 11:26 AM

I'll say this big_loaf, unconsciously or consciously you seem to have made the decision that there is no way to get that "spark" to return. It appears more like you want to end it but the fact you've been in a relationship for so long and the fact it is one of your first that was successful makes you hesitant. You gotta commit in order for anything to happen and it could be a good thing or a bad thing. The problem is you can't break up with someone and expect to still be good friends if they don't see the same problem. There probably will be conflict and she will feel hurt and betrayed, so if you want to stay friends your gonna have to give each other space. The point being your both gonna feel like there is an empty void cause you don't have the other around and you gotta get use to it before hanging out again. Otherwise you will have one of those nights where hanging out alone was totally the "wrong idea."