strangest thing you've ever crashed/almost crashed into?

[Old Guy]

I smacked my gf's butt at 30 mph

Sex on a longboard!

[dozer jr]

i almost smashed into a Jaguar XK today. well not really smashed, but i saw the car and turned around it. the lady flipped out and called the cops. the things she said later made me think that she was one of the most immature adults out there. it was a good laugh for me.

[themccannman]

I got snake guts all over my board, that was a long day of cleaning.

[Tyven]

I ruined a scene of a local soap opera by bombing into the shootings. From the top of the hill I only saw those guys in yellow vests blocking the traffic and an emty road in front of me. When te security guards started yelling and waving it was too late to stop and I just darted through the confused film crew.

[pepperdro]

I'm positive this hasn't happened to anyone else in the existence of longboarding history...

about a week ago, I was just cruising, and I wasn't paying attention, when BAM! My board stopped in it's tracks...

Now, I am rolling with 78mm 76a sector nines so they are pretty squishy... It wasn't a rock I hit....

It was a moose hoof. Yep... I can't make this stuff up... apparently someone hit a moose on the road, and it died. When the clean up crew came out to clean up the mess, and gather the meat to give away, they forgot to pick up the last hoof.

It was in the sidewalk, waiting for it's moment to strike...

asshole moose...

[Arca_ex]

Strangest thing that ever happened to me was here on the Arizona State campus where I go to school. I was boarding back to my dorm after bombing a 10 story garage and was going down Mill Ave, there's a bunch of clubs here etc. Luckily I was wearing my full face and some pads, but I was cruising at about 15MPH and there's a club up ahead. Look pretty dead, there's some dude trying to calm down some chick that is crying and two massive bouncers. Whatevs. I was skating past them when the girl that was crying (apparently s***-tossed drunk and SUPER belligerent) heard me, turned around, pushed me as hard as she could with both hands right in the middle of my back. She heard me coming because the sidewalks there are made out of red bricks that are just set in place. They click together when you ride on them. I never saw it coming since she pushed me from behind for NO apparent reason at all. The initial push even hurt, it cracked my back but then I flew off my board INTO a concrete bench. I yelled all sorts of obscenities at the top of my lungs while I rolled around on the ground for a bit, then got up and started yelling at her like crazy calling her a dumb bitch. She started yelling words that were so slurred I couldn't understand them but then the two massive bouncers started running at me... I got up, ran over to my board, hopped on and gave them the finger as I turned on the burners...


This was all 10x more crazy from my point of view cause I was pretty high and had NO idea what was happening.

[LANDYACHTZ4theWIN]

i ran over a squirrel the other day doing 25-30. threw me off and i slid a bit. god i ####### hate squirrels.

[igotscars]

Me and a frined tag teamed a chipmunk at 50 yesterday haha

EDIT: oh #### john you beat me to it. Coercive was my tagteam partner haha

[K-SHIZZ]

10 chipmunks

holy ####!

[jsweriduk]

On my first board I upgraded my garbage stock bearings that were rusty to new red ones (not bones...I asked for them, and the kid found other bearings that were colored red, but cheaper, and got those instead). they were still faster than I thought. I went down this local hill, and at the bottom was this old lady in her 70's and her white rat-type dog. I turned to avoid her, but started to slide out, and ended up missing her by about a foot. she almost got a heart attack. everyone was fine though, i walked back up to her and apologized, and although still freaked out, she was very nice about it

Edit: This one was not me, it was my bro. so we have this really steep, like really steep hill in my town thats fairly tall. there is 0 runoff though and you have to make a tight 90 degree turn over garbage pavement and sand. my brother decides to take this hill from the top. he get's the wobbles after hitting a bump, and is unable to make the turn. he is heading for the guard rail goin about 20. so about 5 feet from the rail he bails, and him and his board just slide right under the rail. he ended up disappearing completely in the bushes, and i mean completely. he must have gone a good 10 feet into them. that was the last we saw of that board until 2 weeks later. it was undamaged as well except for getting rained on

[ChicagoBoarder21]

Dead squrrel?

[{Troy} {Tweeker}]

I'm positive this hasn't happened to anyone else in the existence of longboarding history...

about a week ago, I was just cruising, and I wasn't paying attention, when BAM! My board stopped in it's tracks...

Now, I am rolling with 78mm 76a sector nines so they are pretty squishy... It wasn't a rock I hit....

It was a moose hoof. Yep... I can't make this stuff up... apparently someone hit a moose on the road, and it died. When the clean up crew came out to clean up the mess, and gather the meat to give away, they forgot to pick up the last hoof.

It was in the sidewalk, waiting for it's moment to strike...

asshole moose...

god Alaska sucks like that Dont it pepper

[Loopole]

Ran over: My own foot, my friends foot, a shoe, big sticks, big rocks.
Just missed: A squirell, a chipmunk, cars, my friend on his bike >.<
Hit and fall: shady wet spot while massive carving, car with person right there....
Attacked: Atleast 4 times people thinking there cute, either pushing me or kicking my board....

Oh and skateboarding I looked back at my friend to see if he was with me, hit a rock or something. face plant = half a front tooth.

[camlyks2lb]

Duck poo! Yep, here in New Zealand, we have plenty of ducks, and they are often squatting on my favorite skateboarding spot infecting the road with there huge green dejections. Better to slalom between them if you don't want your wheels to slide! It's sound a bit weird, but we have to share earth with wildlife that's it!

haha! sounds like down the road from me, theres this pond thing and all these ****ing ducks #### on this smooth as smooth road, and i skate, and freak out and fly off my board, while this hot chick i know was watching...

[PDP]

My buddy hit a cow at about 40, he knocked it over but managed to stay on his board.

[Fortune]

Laptop and an emo kid.

Laptop was broken and looked old enough to have been in the civil war, thing weighed like 20 pounds. Didn't hit it, but had to swerve like a madman to avoid it. Nearly rode off the curb and onto the highway >_>

Emo kid just wasn't paying attention and for some reason decided that the left side of the sidewalk wasn't good enough, so he swerved right in front of me.

[AATTYYRR]

my non-longboarder friend, attempting to race me down a mild hill... he bails afetr 30 feet, after i gave him a huge head start...
i ctach up almost immediately...
he's on the ground infront of me, like 8 or so feet...
i was going decently fast, and couldnt turn in time, so i try running off... and i eat pavement...
all on his birthday...
i tore my new jeans and had a very stiff knee for a few weeks...

[GhengisChron]

it sounds common.

but i also hit a dead squirrel just the other day. it was all camoflauged in some sticks and leaves and #### in the bike lane, and i din't really have a choice but to roll through the debris, and at the last second i saw a dead squirell directly in my path. kinda gross.

[otangstreetcarver]

i didn't crash into it but the other day a porcupine crossed the street about 5 yards away from me. i thought that was pretty strange.

[kbball]

I crashed into a bush and it snapped onto the ground and was just ride like5mph. It felt kind of cool to flatten a bush